βYou are not the work you do but the person you areβ ~ Toni Morrison
How many times has someone asked, "What is it you do for work?". Do you have a neat and concise answer?
Maybe you are an accountant, a designer, a student or a fitness instructor. Maybe you respond with something like "I work in banking" or "I'm in pharma". Maybe you are in transition and trying to figure life out but don't feel like sharing the details. Or, maybe you just make something up because it's easier than sharing a longer explanation.
I have been all of those things. Clear, concise. Vague, unsure. And, annoyed when the question comes up too!
The thing is, I genuinely believe that "What is it you do for work?" is asked from a place of connection. A question to get to know someone, to break the ice. It isn't meant to make the other person feel uncomfortable or less than. It is simply a way of trying to break the ice and start a conversation.
I've struggled with this question. It was easier to answer when I worked in the corporate banking world running an operations team. I work for a bank. It was easier to answer when I was fully immersed in the business of interior design. I'm an interior decorator.
But as my work has shifted over the past five years I found it difficult to sum up what it is I do in one neat bow. Because it was new to me, and I wasn't feeling confident, I worried what others would think. And, because I was still figuring things out and didn't yet have clarity myself it was hard to describe to others what it is I do.
All I knew was what I was doing wasn't working for me anymore. I was feeling called to shift direction. I had a vague idea of where I wanted to go. But I didn't know exactly what it would look like or how I was going to get there. The past five years have felt like one giant (and, at times, never-ending) period of transition.
I know I made it confusing for my friends and family when I continued to take on design projects while simultaneously doing things like writing a book, running workshops and writing a weekly newsletter talking about habits and intentional living.
On the surface (aka social media) it seemed like I'd dropped everything design-related but in reality, it was still very much a part of my life. While I was feeling and doing and failing my way into something new design was a space where I still felt confident.
If only life was as simple as walking through a set of doors and instantly becoming a whole new person (joking, sort of). The reality is there was no a-ha moment for me. No instant lightbulb or bell dinging with the answer. No manual or checklist to follow. I needed to put the reps in. I needed to write and share my ideas. I needed to run the workshops and talk to people.
It was the doing that brought clarity. Doing made things real. I came to understand that I couldn't think my way to a new place ... I had to take action. I needed to keep showing up consistently and seeing what worked and what didn't.
Part of me thought it didn't matter if it wasn't clear to others what I was doing. Live your life, Sarah! Who cares if others understand. But the reality is it does matter.
If I want to be able to help in the way I envision and make a meaningful impact in the lives of others it means being clear about what I do.
This realization hit home this week when a woman in one of my networking groups said to me: "I knew you wrote a book, I knew it was about habits but I didn't really understand what it meant and what you did.". Helpful and timely feedback even if I cringed a little when she said it.
Now, at the start of 2024 when you ask me "What it is you do" here's the answer you'll get:
I work primarily with women between the ages of 45 - 65 who are navigating a time of transition. I help them get clear on what it is they want using habits as a tool to move forward and manage the chaos of life. These are women who might be recent empty nesters, are about to or recently retired, are in a career transition or women who are navigating the dance of raising kids while simultaneously caring for their older parents.
I do this by offering group workshops and one-on-one coaching and by sharing my experience, ideas and tools in this weekly newsletter.
And, because nothing in life is ever tied up in a neat little bow, as I transition to this next phase of my life, I still work with a few amazing design clients and am ever grateful for their support.
When I was a little girl I thought I would have life all figured out by now. Boy oh boy was I wrong. Change is a constant. Sometimes the transitions are smooth. Sometimes they are kinda rocky. But change is going to happen regardless.
I've learned (and am still learning!) that it's all in how I navigate the bumps of life. With a little practice, some tools and a clear vision for the future transitions aren't so scary anymore.
Tell me, when someone asks "What is it you do?" are you excited to respond? Or, does the question fill you with dread because you just aren't sure anymore? I'd love to know.
Wishing you a sunny and restorative weekend.
Walking forward with gratitude,
Sarah
PS - I'd love it if you shared this newsletter with others who you think might benefit.